Ryan Perriloux is Stupid

Being Responsible is Hard but Beautifying Work

It is so great that I have the opportunity to be a leader on a team that might be in contention for the college football national championship. I sure would not want to do anything that would jeopardize my team’s chances. I think I will just take it easy during this bye weekend. Maybe I will just kick it with my baby’s momma or I guess I could take her to see some of my teammate’s band play at the Varsity. Yeah, that seems like a better idea, and it will keep me out of trouble. I sure do not want to disappoint my coaches, teammates, or fans by doing anything stupid. I think I’ll call my boy, Derrick Odom up and see if he is taking his baby’s momma out or if they are just going to chill. I bet he would want to come and that way we can make sure that neither of us gets into any trouble since we do not have a game this weekend. It would so stupid to get into any more trouble. Especially with my role on the team ever expanding and my chances to one day lead this team an almost certain. These bye weekends can be such a blessing. A chance to relax, take in all of the glory we have achieved, and make sure that nothing goes on to change my status with the team and in the eyes of all those who care about LSU Athletics.

Hey, this band is really great. They jam and my baby’s momma looks so hot right now. Just the way that tube top grabs her extended belly, which is teeming with a life that we created, makes me want to hit it again. I have so many responsibilities. Sure am glad I took this chance to just take it easy and realign my priorities. This bye week has been so good for me. I can evaluate where I am as a player, college student, and man of the universe. I just want to center myself and keep my chi or some shit in line.

Wow, I cannot believe the show is already over. Whoa, its two in the morning. I need to get home and make sure that the mother of my child is safe in bed and I get a full night’s rest so my body and mind will be in top football form. Wait a second, are those two assholes frontin’ on my boy Odom over there? What do you mean we need to leave? This is ridiculous! I am not going anywhere. Oh, I have to leave?!? No, you have to leave. Do you know who I am and who he is? Get a clue asshole.

We can only assume a fight broke out and Odom and Perriloux got jacked around by bouncers at the Varsity. Then the cops showed up. No one knows really what happened right now, but we here at Bearsuits Are Funny feel that it was almost certainly the height of embarrassment and stupidity from both Perriloux and Odom, in regards to themselves and LSU football.

If this shit turns out the way it looks like it might I hope the Les Miles drops the proverbial hammer on these two thumb sucking idiots. You do not want someone like this leading your team at quarterback. I would like everyone to remember Marcus Vick from Virginia Tech. All the talent in the world does not matter if you cannot handle yourself like a grown ass man away from the glaring eyeballs of the Hat. LSU football will be the biggest loser in all of this and so when the shit starts getting nasty on the field, remember, Perriloux felt it was better to hang around with Derrick Odom and get into more trouble than to take his position and responsibilities seriously. Every ounce of my being hopes that this does not negatively affect the Tigers for the rest of the season and in my opinion the most important part of this season.