Ante Meridiem Eye Openers-September 11, 2008CE

1) Today is the seventh anniversary of the 9/11 attacks, and of course there are no jokes to be made about that. The memorial at the pentagon has finally been completed in time for this anniversary, while we are still waiting for the memorials in NYC and the Pennsylvania field. One thing I noticed about the new NYC memorial is that they will include the names of those that died in the first terrorist bombing in 1993. It's nice to know that the horrific attacks of 9/11 won't over-shadow the lives lost in previous attacks. One life is no more memorialized than another, no matter the date. John McCain and Barack Obama will be together on stage for the ceremony in NYC to remember those lost, effectively putting the campaigns on hold or a day, which is sorely needed these days. Dear assholes, Any break in the silly shit is appreciated. Thanks, America.

2) Hurricane Ike is chugging through the gulf on a new heading towards Houston. Mandatory and voluntary evacuations are being instituted along the gulf coast of Texas, which puts my thought of going down for a hurricane party in jeopardy. Let's be honest, it's not a good idea at any time, but then again I am not known for good ideas. Like when I got my middle named changed to Bernie Kosar on a dare. The U!!!!

3) In sports, The Cubbies finally won a goddamn game in their latest attempt to fuck everything up before the playoffs. It's always good to get in a losing streak right before you try to win games on the serious. FUCK!!
And the Los Angeles, California Angels of Anaheim, California won the AL west last night. yay.
In New Orleans Saints news, everyone is hurt. Most promibnently Marques Colston, their premiere receiver, is out 4-6 weeks with ligament surgery to his thumb. Again, I think it's the Brady Syndrome, where everyone thinks its cool to get their muscles, tendons, and ligaments ripped to shreds. Hint: it's not that cool.
49ers QB Alex Smith is no more, going on the IR and most likely being cut from the team he kept in the neck and neck race to see which team was worse, San Francisco or Oakland. Battle for the Bay winner: Oakland Raiders.

4) I sat here at work and giggled uncontrollably while reading this guys test-drive of several adult diapers. Yes, he field tested adult diapers, and my favorite line happens to be "My experience with Kroger was particularly memorable, which isn't a good thing when it comes to diapers."

5) OK my computer is trying to update itself, which means its ungodly slow, so lets wrap this up. Energy executives gave drugs and sex to Interior Department employees in exhange for the Teapot Dome or something. All this tells me is that I really need to get that degree in Public Adminsitration.
Those fucking frogs are alweays up to something. If it's not trying to get children to read with a computer pen, its disappearing for over a decade in Australia. Crazy fucks!
The civilian leadership at the Pentagon really knows how to screw stuff up, especially the leadership of the Air Force. These are the people who want a new fighter jet every 10 years and can't replace the KC-135 fuel tankers or the B-52 bombers even though these planes are over 50 years old. Which is what happens when you put a bunch of fighter pilots and hotshots in command, said the grandson of a SAC man, who had to listen about that for years.

Well, that's about it. It's like SAC Commander, and Air Force Chief of Staff Curtis LeMay said: "I have tried at all times to slaughter as few civilians as possible."