A Boyhood Dream

Oh my GOD! Did what I think just happen happen? Am I, Justin Tison, standing atop the Aggro Crag alone and victorious? I am the only one I see, oh wait, it looks like Paul “The Flash” Folsciano just got here. But I think I was the first one. Oh yeah I was, I can see the chick still struggling through the glitter stuff trying to find the last actuator. Ha, stupid girl. Did she actually think she could compete with boys? I guess she did. Well not this time Susan “The Merchant of Death” Marcotto, or whatever stupid name they gave you. I wonder if my friends will watch this. Hey mom, look at this. Awesome!

Oh, I have Guts baby!

I hate the nicknames they gave us. Justin “The Time Bomb” Tison?!? That is so stupid. Once I get down there and get my piece of this mountain I am going to ask to change it. Possibly Justin “Michelangelo” Tison. The Ninja Turtles are so awesome. I wonder what they would say to me if they were here. I bet we would get pizza and then talk about how awesome it is to rule everything in every way.

Wow, it is really taking a long time for us to get down this thing the “safe” way. I am so excited. They said to act nice to the other players even if you win, but that goober Paul has been pretty mean the whole time. Well look who rules now, Flash. Me, Justin Tison.

This is the greatest day of my life, no doubt. Nothing could be better than winning GUTS, nothing. I cannot wait for Mo to slip that gold medal over my neck and hand me a huge piece of the Aggro Crag. How am I going to carry it? I bet holding a molten piece of mountain will make my arms tired. And the other winners I have seen all seem so strong they just lift it up and shake it around. No matter what I am going to do my best to make sure I look as cool as I feel with a new piece of the Crag!

Oh wow, the crowd is going crazy. I am sure my physical and mental superiority shined through the entire battle. They really love me. Ok, here comes Mo. Just be cool Justin. Be cool. That’s it, let her slip it over your head. Remain calm. Oh wait, I think I have remained calm too long. Get excited. Get excited. Ok chill, here it comes. Yes the actual piece of the mountain. Well I hope not, God, it would be embarrassing to not be able to lift this thing. Here we go….

"Colossus" Tison. The name I really wanted.

Awesome, its just foam. I guess the real molten Aggro Crag piece is back stage. No wonder these other jerks lifted it so easy, I think its Styrofoam. Ok, that weird host guy is done talking. (I sure hope they never give him a shot at sitcom stardom.) Camera coming back. Hey look at me lifting this huge piece of mountain over my head. My friends are going to think I am the coolest person ever, and they are correct. Also the strongest because I am lifting this mountain boulder over my head like Colossus. It would be so cool to hang out with Colossus and Wolverine after this victory. I know they would want to hang out with me. God, this game could really lead to some amazing things for me. This was the best experience of my life. I cannot imagine a greater day. I will talk about this for the rest of my life. Yes, world, I do indeed have G-U-T-S, GUTS!