Jammin' Bonerz in the Evening!

Welcome to our new evening edition...just kidding. I never jam bonerz in the evening. It is strictly an afternoon activity. I bring you this update of my 5 day/6 night extravagant cruise through the scenic Gulf of Mexico. I type this from the Internet Lounge on the Carnival Ecstasy, one of many ships in which Kathie Lee Gifford has had sex. The first day at sea it took me all of half a day to break my streak of noninterneting, so as you can see it is an addiction.

There is much to do on the Carnival Ecstasy, from drinking out on one of the many sun decks, to drinking in one of the many bars and nightclubs, to drinking alone in the tiny, tiny bathroom of your stateroom, curled up in the shower, which is severely lacking in water pressure. There is more food than you can shake a stick at, and if you would like to purchase a stick one can be found in the gift shop for $29.99, duty free. One good thing is my purchase of an Irish coffee liqueur/cream combo, not available in the states, which when poured together make an automatic buttery nipple.

Today I disembarked the boat at Progresso, Mexico. Please visit Progresso if you never want the stench of sewage, fish, and Mexico to ever leave your nasal passages. But I did board a bus and drive out to one of the new Seven Wonders of the World, Chichen Itza. Very interesting. The temple is also a calendar.

Tomorrow I join my fellow dirty capitalist American passengers in Cozumel, tourist capital of the Yucatan. I expect to find several tshirts with severely witty and not-at-all gouche sayings on them, probably indicating the size of my "johnson" or how many beers I can drink in a given time period.

All in all, this is a darn good vacation. I get to do just about whatever I want at just about anytime of day/night. So see you bright and early Monday morning for the AMEO, and stick around for the ANBJ.....