1) The new definition of poor came out, and apparently I'm strictly middle class. I have bought a new suit within the past 2 years--check. I have been on vacation this year--check. But what gets me near the upper class line is that to meet the poverty line you are allowed enough liquor to get drunk twice a month. Christ man, I get drunk twice a day. All this time I thought I was just a drunk poor man, turns out I'm a wealthy drunk.
2) I know it's Monday morning, and you don't particularly want to vomit all over your morning bagel, but guess what: Japan has a 73 year-old porn star. Apparently "Elderly Porn" is a booming business in Japan, where, according to statistics, they have a shitload of old people. I can honestly say, I have no desire to see even a small clip of this, and I watch midget interracial amputee bondage snuff porn. Ok ok ok, I'm kidding. I don't like bondage.
3) In sports, Brett Favre, who has retired from the Green Bay Packers made the decision not to show up for the job he doesn't have and the company doesn't want him. It seems like a no brainer, except Favre is notorious for not getting the hint. He thought that Joe Montana was a showstopper in Kansas City, and he continued to buy his wife hairbrushes during her bout with cancer.
4) In science, I would not want to be around in several hundred million years when the continents drift together once more to form anther super continent. I imagine that property values are going to plummet after the coastlines are turned into super mountains.
Well that's about it. It's like Adam Smith said in Wealth of Nations: "No society can be flourishing and happy if the greater part of the members are poor and miserable."
Monday, July 28, 2008
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