Ante Meridiem Eye Openers-November 6, 2008CE

1) President-Elect Barack Obama is swiftly moving into his transition phase, tentatively naming Rahm Emanuel (D-Il) as his new Chief of Staff. Everyone knows what a Chief of Staff does: They coordinate the Presidents life and make most of the important decisions, while struggling with alcoholism before finally dying of a heart attack while running for Vice President. It's all in The West Wing: civics for dummies.
Speculation has it that Obama might have as diverse a cabinet in regards to political parties as he does in race. Traditionally the cabinet is "Bipartisan" when the presidents throws a bone to the other party in the form of veterans affairs of transportation *makes jerkoff motion*. Republicans Chuck Hagel and Dick Lugar (BEST. NAME. EVER.) are floated as is in the running as is the prospect that current Secretary of Defense Robert Gates will continue in that post, continuing steady leadership during wartime.

2) This election is far from over sirs and maams and ladyboys. Or is it ladiesboy? No matter. There are still Senate races to be decided, one especially in Minnesota where norm Coleman leads Al Franken by about 720 votes.

You know what? My boss turned her crazy gland on over drive so I've spent all morning cleaning out this office. So fuck her, and fuck this. Obama is President. Somethings change, some stay the same. Allen Iverson is a Piston, and still old. CNN invented hologram technology. And Greg Maddux wins another Gold Glove. There. The news. Goddammit, I hate this place...