Remember: Always wash your hands directly after inseminating a cow while working on a dairy farm. Also, it is recommended you wear gloves during this procedure. I wasn't told that at the time...plus I'm paying out the ass in child support to Omaha Steaks...
Why is she so happy???Remember: Never tell friends that you have not seen the movies The Princess Bride or The Goonies. They will huff and puff and blow your house down, and by house I mean more huffing and puffing. It is probable they might actually let their jaw fall lax while widening their eyes. This condition will be further exacerbated when informed you once watched Mannequin and Dragnet: The Movie every single day one summer...
Remember: Always measure your photos, posters, or paintings before buying frames...ESPECIALLY if you bought said pictures on the interwebs. Did you know that 16x20 doesn't mean 16x20? It means 17 1/8ths x 19 7/8ths? This had the unintended effect of me buying the wrong frames. But don't you worry about ole Russell...I bought them on sale!!! Which means when I took them back, the same frames a size bigger were almost double!!! So my kickass prints (here and here) now reside in cheapo poster frames, belying my urbane sense of style...
In conclusion, I just want any international supermodels or billionaire widow-cougars who regularly read this site to know I've never had my hand in a cow's vagina...but I do know way too many lines spoken by Meshach Taylor to one Mr. Andrew McCarthy...
I leave you with two videos. One is the first scene from The Venture Brothers, Season 2, Episode 1. If you don't get it, or remember it, then go back and watch every episode of this spectacular series. The second video is the song in its entirety. Not every song I like is 30 years old...
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OK, now you're just teasing me with the L&O/Batman print.
ReplyDeleteWell played, sir. Well played.
Oh, it's no joke...it's on my wall currently
ReplyDelete